I Am Being Abused and I Have Kids: Should I Stay or Leave?

I Am Being Abused and I Have Kids: Should I Stay or Leave?

Often we encounter women who know they are being abused by their husbands, yet they are wracked with guilt as to what they should do for the sake of their children. When the abuse doesn’t appear to be directed at the children specifically, the victim may surmise that having a less than ideal family is better than disrupting the family unit through the process of church discipline, separation, or divorce.

But in abusive situations, your children ARE being abused. Read on to learn more about combatting this generational sin.

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Identifying an Emotionally Abusive Marriage (and What to Do About It)

Identifying an Emotionally Abusive Marriage (and What to Do About It)

When most people think of domestic violence, they think of physical or sexual abuse, in which one person is using physical means to control their partner (whether by hitting, forcibly restraining, raping, or otherwise assaulting the person). But domestic violence includes other means of emotional, mental, or spiritual abuse that seek assert power and dominance over a victim, stripping her of her God-given uniqueness and individuality. These forms of psychological abuse leave scars on the psyche of the victim, denying her the ability to live freely in her marriage, in the manner God intended for her.

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Feeling Like You Have Wasted Years on a Failed Marriage? Here's Help.

Feeling Like You Have Wasted Years on a Failed Marriage? Here's Help.

These women often have the same thing in common. They are haunted by years of endless broken promises. Second chances became third chances and fourth chances. Hundreds of chances (and perhaps decades) later, these women often eventually feel that their efforts were in vain. Forgiveness repeatedly gave way to the devastating pain and betrayal of perpetual abuse, and what remained was the hollow shell of a marriage, if the marriage survived at all.

Why does the cycle go on this way? We believe we can help. We choose to see the good in our husbands. We believe in their best intentions. We might even understand the traumas that have taught them to behave this way. But sometimes, it all falls apart and we are left without answers. In turn, this may leave some of us feeling we are without hope. But girlfriend, God’s not done with you.

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The Best Thing You Can Do to Help Your Abusive Husband

The Best Thing You Can Do to Help Your Abusive Husband

How can you truly help an abusive husband?

In the case of true emotional abuse, you are "alcohol to the alcoholic." As an alcoholic spirals out of control, eventually he or she cannot hide the drunkenness that ultimately accompanies their addiction. However, an emotional abuser is not subject to the crushing reality of his power addiction when his victim remains silent. Silence perpetuates abuse by shielding the abuser from the natural consequences of his actions.

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